Dear Ray,
The following are my comments:
BAD 2001 Version 8
------------------
1. Cover sheet: under supporting BAD(s) "Measurement" is misspelled.
2. Abstract: standard notation 'D-wave' or 'd-wave'. I recall in
spectroscopy that the later is standard. Don't know what is
standard in this context of BaBar.
3. Line 171: 'Heavy Quark Symmetry' should be referenced.
4. Line 175: 'D-wave' or 'd-wave' ?
5. Line 241: should be 'kinematics are' ... I've never seen the
singular used.
6. Line 290: Suggest 'In order to disentangle .. '
7. Line 330: English spelling 'normalisation' whereas on line 334
'parameterization' is used. Should be consistent English or
American. I prefer the American 'z'.
8. Line 369: suggest 'Table' be capitalized.
9. Line 397: 'Aa' should be 'As'
10. Line 413: suggest that there be some summary sentence indicating what
'science' has been accomplished by measuring these BRs. The reader is
left with the question of 'so what' ... to be crude.
BAD 2044 Version 7
------------------
1. General comment: paper seems to be in an early draft. There are
several awkward parts.
2. Abstract line 15: suggest that there be a sentence why this search is
interesting - saying even that the BR is expected to be small by SM
and a large value would indicate violation.
3. Line 27: Again some physics would be interesting. References are given
but no reason is given why one should go to all this trouble.
4. Line 27 & 39: Suggesting moving sentence on Line 39 to line 27 to end
the first paragraph of the introduction.
5. Line 29: What is 'factorization' - of what ... Again references are
given but the non-expert does not know what is being 'factorized'.
6. Line 34: suggest 'fL=0.38' rather than 'of'.
7. Line 36: suggest noting that theoretical errors are added in
quadrature.
8. Line 37: suggest reference be given for 'penguin annihilation
parameters'.
9. Line 44: change 'was produced by' to 'from'.
10. Line 46 & 47: eliminate commas
11. Line 48: change 'a superconducting' to 'the BaBar superconducting'
12. line 53: what does 'Exclusive' mean?
13. Line 57: P-wave, etc. should be p-wave .. ?
14. Line 58: 'A systematic uncertainty ...' change to 'The systematic ..'
Using 'A' implies that there are other uncertainties but these are not
mentioned.
15. Line 61: suggest not starting sentence with symbol a1+
16. Line 75-81: Description of coordinate system hard to visualize. A
figure would help.
17. Line 103: eliminate comma
18. Line 139: eliminate comma
19. Line 152: what is the 'joint ideal angular distribution'. What part of
the angular is 'joint'?
20. Line 155: change 'belief' to 'guidance'
21. Line 172: Physics results - in agreement with 'naive factorization
...' but what does that really mean? The reader is forced to look up
references in order to find out what this is ... a simple sentence of
the 'physics' would illuminate.
22. Line 186: change capitalize 'program'.
I confess that I spent mental energy editing these papers but did not
absorb all of their physics.
Best regards,
Frank
Frank E. Taylor
CERN MIT
ATLAS Collaboration Bldg. 26 - Rm 569
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Switzerland USA
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On Wed, 23 Jul 2008, Ray F. Cowan wrote:
> Hi Everyone,
>
> At the LQS meeting today we that decided reviewing two BADs by phone
> at the same time would be too difficult, so instead please just send me
> your comments on each BAD by email. I'll combine and post them in
> Hypernews. The CWR period for both ends July 24, so please send me your
> comments by tomorrow.
>
> Thanks very much,
> --Ray
>
